life update

Things have been busy these past few days, but in a quiet way. I am crashing at a friend's (and fellow blogger's) apartment for my last week here in Taipei, as my old contract ended on Friday. In the process of packing, I discovered that I couldn't find my (new!) watercolor sketchbook, nor my watch. The loss of the sketchbook is like a punch to the stomach, and I will have to ask around to see if I left it at one of my relatives' homes.

My ShiDa class also ended last Friday, and we watched Lee Ang's "Eat Drink, Man Woman" in celebration. That movie made me so hungry by the time class ended, food was all I could think about. So I stopped to get some takeout guotie and rushed home to eat it. My hands were shaking while I ate, which I found kind of an extreme response. I hadn't thought I would be that hungry.

I feel like I should have a lot of regrets now that the MTC summer is over-regrets about not getting more involved at the university and with its students, about not exploring the area more while I had lived nearby... But, honestly, I don't feel too badly. The recent typhoon and now oppressive heat have diminished my enthusiasm for taking longer walks outside. Call me a wimp, but this humidity is getting to be too much for me. Not to mention my heat rash is coming back.

Until a few weeks ago, I honestly could not wait to return to the states and, more specifically, my campus, unlike my other classmates who relish the Taiwanese lifestyle. And yet there is a part of me that wants to return once I graduate college and continue improving my Chinese. What a quandary. Now my relatives talk of my pursuing a Master's here and applying for dual nationality so I can work here as well.

For one who doesn't think too far ahead into the future of my own life, I am taking a lot into consideration. There is so much I want to do and see, but I also want to be successful, in ways that are meaningful to me, and I also want to find a companion for all of that. Maybe I already have.

Well, I am losing focus. When all else fails, I can still fall back on the wonderful addiction that is Desktop Tower Defense.

花蓮

Spent the weekend on the lovely eastern coast of Taiwan, namely, Hualien City. My cousin set it all up, and there were 10 of us altogether. For most of Saturday, though, I wasn't with them as I was the only one who wanted to tour Taroko Gorge. The others went white-water rafting. So I ended up taking this tour with a bunch of other students from 台大, also doing the MTC program there, as well as some Singaporeans and Malaysians. Ended up having a great time. Taroko is very beautiful, and I wished we could have explored some of the less "touristy" trails.

Anyway, also walked a bit around the streets of Hualien later that night, and early the next morning as well, where I found some graffiti (yay!). Sunday was spent packing, and then dolphin watching (which they advertised as whale watching, which while technically correct is still a misnomer, dammit).

Stinky tofu, and no I didn't try it

Fun with sparklers and my camera's ISO speed

Taroko Gorge tour:

Graffiti along one 自由街, 花蓮
Lunch

Fun with sparklers, part two

sunday bloody sunday

It is a boring Sunday eve here chez moi, and I've just finished my ShiDa homework and dusted off the ole sketchbook. I'm such a homebody it's not funny. It really isn't.

I was mildly disappointed that I didn't go to the Formoz Festival, despite it's ticket price and the fact that I know none of the artists on their web listing. I am so not in the culture loop. But we already knew that.

And later, I found out about the pool party that went on all this afternoon and by then it was too late to go. Damn it all! I am so antsy to fight this building inertia I feel like I'm going to explode. I've made this list of musts: places to see and things to do before I go home. And I plan to start doing those things starting tomorrow morning. Time to get rid of this funk I'm in!

And, with that, here are some search terms that have led unwitting visitors to this blog: "black classim (sic)," "big moth striped body proboscis," "leaf cocoon taiwan," "a guide to western etiquette," "pee standing -women pee standing," and my most recent and most favorite, "marriage minded ladyboys."

Sorry to disappoint, my dear visitors!

internal weather report

I have just realized something. Or, rather, something has just hit me, with such a staggering force that I feel a little like I've been punched. I have just realized that I miss sitting on grass, and rock, and tree branches, I miss the sounds of wind through thousands of leaves, trickling water, and hearing leaves and gravel crunch under my feet.

For three months now I've lived and explored this city of Taipei, trying to come to terms with the culture, its people, its traditions. But now, I simply miss what I cannot seem to find here, and that is a specific kind of weather, nature, atmosphere, that I can visualize more easily than express. I miss having seasons, especially, desperately, autumn. I miss experiencing a thunderstorm, hearing, feeling, and breathing it in, and being able to see its effects on the land, rather than simply a city that has been drained of color. I miss the prickling almost-annoyance of a thousand grass blades pressing into my prone body from below, with the sun beating down from above and fleeting clouds moving swiftly past.

I should have known; after all, I think I will always be a country bumpkin at heart, regardless of how my relatives praise my "city suaveness," and the fact that I am now comfortable using all forms of public transportation here. And I realize I am waxing terribly poetic about this, but I feel the effects of this as if it were some terrible reversal of Seasonal Affective Disorder.

...

I am also hungry, and past experience has taught me that my empty stomach makes me all shades of irritable.

non-erstwhile adventures

I'm still working on a composite Thailand post that will be completed sometime, but that is taking a backburner in favor of my latest wandering adventures into the guts of Taipei. Today, I bring you a look at the burgeoning* graffiti culture here:

Tunks Chek: a name I have come to recognize throughout the unguarded walls of Taipei. I first saw his signature along a building near, I think, the 師大一 bus stop. Saw him a couple more times in this little cache of graffiti I went to.

Wall of Graffiti

The famous kitten gets a place on a pillar

The MRT passing above the Wall of Graffiti

Sweet giraffe. There was also great design to both sides, but I couldn't get it all in without losing the detail.

I had been meaning to stop here for weeks now, because I used to see it every day as I took the MRT to ShiDa, when I still lived with my relatives. I took the opportunity today, as I was heading up to the Formosa Fun Coast, had time to spare before the allotted meeting time there with my cousins, and it was on the way there.

Not that I wasn't a little wary of poking my nose around the underbelly of the MRT and Expressway, stepping around broken glass and discarded items in my flip flops, digital camera in hand, and I did get some strange looks, but nothing bad happened.

*Ok, I honestly have no idea if the graffiti culture is burgeoning or in full bloom. I guess I assumed, with the rigidity of social customs and traditions here, that graffiti artists are only just starting to appear. Perhaps I am mistaken. I'd love to hear from anyone with more information though!

backpedalwhoa (+ racismboo)

So, after my last post, in which I whine and whinge about how unfair life is for poor me, I feel that I must balance out the perspective a bit, as I so often fail to do. Because, to be fair, many of my relatives are purely wonderful, kind-hearted people. Many of them realize that I am different, have grown up in a different culture, and make the effort to understand me. And that is something I truly appreciate, because, really, we are not really all that different, all of us.

I can also understand that they are a conservative clan, having grown up in the circumstances they did, and holding many traditional views about gender roles, respect, education, and filial piety. I am, I know, not as patient as I could be in accepting these cultural differences between me and my relatives.

As of now, all I can do is continue communicating with them, having these talks where we work to understand each other, as I have often had with my aunts regarding dating and race. They are often bemused, or perhaps amused, by my "equal opportunity dating" stance. And while I am not trying to excuse the often blatant racism that exists in Taiwan, I can understand that any homogeneous, conservative society is inevitably going to have difficulty accepting "outsiders" in their midst. I am hoping, through these conversations with my relatives, to help widen that acceptance margin.

And not only are the outsiders of Taiwan many (i.e. all non-East-Asians), but they are also ranked on a graded scale of acceptability. I would say Caucasians are probably at the top, most likely to be accepted (or at least pardoned) by locals here. And, here is no big surprise, dark-skinned and black people rank very low on this scale.

I walk to and from ShiDa every day and see the conglomeration of all these different races, coming for language exchange opportunities, and I love seeing that kind of diversity. But, then I wonder, once they leave the confines of the university and surrounding district, what must it be like to be so starkly different - physically, culturally, and even mentally?

Well, maybe Kevin is right and the current generation is not willing to blindly follow their predecessors into becoming drones of education, and I hope that also means they are more open-minded. I am not seeing that, but of course any change will take time. I am only going to be here for three months, after all.

In all of this, I cannot help but be reminded that, half a globe away back at campus, I have a friend, a black male, who is interested in Chinese and economics and politics, and has this crazy vision of rallying the Asian-Americans to fight for their rights and against racial discrimination in the United States.

Right, well, I think I've babbled on long enough. I have a trip to Thailand to prepare for, and so I will be offline for the next 5 days. What a refreshing change of pace.

Of cabbages and kings

I guess I never wrote about the Hohaiyan Festival; and, in truth, there isn't much to write about. I went on a crowded train with no sitting room to Fulong beach, and was greeted with a scenario very much similar to when I visited Danshui: lots of little tourist shops and game shops and food vendors, bright neon lights and way too many people.

The music itself was hit or miss. The band that was playing when I arrived around 6:30 wasn't bad. There was also a girl with a guitar who was pretty good as well, playing covers of James Blunt's "You're Beautiful" and Coldplay's "Clocks," as well as some Chinese songs. I listened, took pictures, and, after a couple hours, went in search of food. I figured it would be better to leave early and avoid the congestion at the end of the festival. Only realized later that that meant missing Cui Jian, the "Bob Dylan/Bruce Springsteen" of China. Damn.

It probably would have been more fun to have gone to the festival with other people, but no one wanted to take the trip out with me. And, considering I am over the half-way point of my stay in Taiwan, I would like to get out more, even if that means going solo.

How clichéd. But it is true. I am not so much trying to connect to my "roots" as just seeking companionship and a sense of belonging in a place I do not really feel I understand. I'm not sure going to rock concerts alone does this, as I did not meet anyone new there, but what would my alternatives have been? Staying in my apartment? Or going out with my relatives to the next hot new restaurant to laud their food? Or tagging along with my cousins to Sogo or the Breeze Center?

The events of the past few days really brought out this misalignment of interests between me and my peers here. Last night, after a lone dinner at Alleycat's, I went to visit a nearby relative's house, where another cousin had also come to call. My uncle, upon seeing me, declared that he was going to take me out for drinks, and managed to drag my cousin along as well. Turns out he took us to Saints and Sinners, whose environment I thoroughly enjoyed, as my uncle kept pointing out: "See, you're from America! This is your kind of place."

In any case, there was a foosbol table and pool table, much to my delight, and after beating my uncle soundly at foosbol (sorry, Uncle, for the disrespect), we returned to our table and had drinks. I had a way-too-strong gin and tonic, and later ordered fries to help finish off my drink. We chatted inbetween sips and munches, and my cousin noted how I was now going to be busy now, with one uncle wanting to take me out to pubs, and another wanting to take me hiking up mountain trails, and how their respective families will be glad now that they won't have to deal with being pestered about doing these things.

And, yes, that's exactly what I enjoy doing. Going out to bars, maybe shooting some pool, at night, and exploring both the natural and urban trails of Taipei, by foot. I get remarks from my family about how "good at walking" I have become-that is a direct Chinese translation, with connotations that I am slightly too weird and independent for my relatives to understand.

"It's because she's American-born and raised," they say. And I guess it is. What self-respecting Taiwanese girl goes outside, without an umbrella and risking getting skin cancer or, worse, dark skin (cue Hermione Granger voice and Ron's incredulous 'She needs to sort out her priorities') and spends hours tramping around alone instead of buying cute clothes and looking for marriage prospects?

The worst of all of this, because I personally could care less what they think (and that's not necessarily a good thing in any case), is that everything I do reflects back on my mother. She warned me of this very clearly on the car-ride to the airport, told me not to make her look bad, or that she would be unable to go back and face her family.

So...what do I do?



Oh...and also, my moth appears to be a member of the Theretra latreillei species. Hurrah!

Completed cycle

So, I am all tired and excited from spending the evening at the Hohaiyan Rock Festival, but that will have to wait. Because, as I came home (to my spanky new apartment), I was greeted by my new roommate!

Isn't s/he pretty?

The cycle is now complete. Sadly, this might be the only survivor, as this moth is the caterpillar that pupated last.

From eyespots and stripes

To hard, protective shells

To produce something like this...

This metamorphosis has never ceased to amaze and confound me.

Of bugs galore

In searching for information on the Four Beast mountain (SiShou Shan-the alliteration mountain), I came across this fantastic site listing photos and IDs of insects at the SiShou park. Unfortunately it's all in Chinese, but just click on photo lists and select from the list menu on the left sidebar.

Grasshoppers
Walking sticks
Earwigs
Cockroaches
Mantids
Hemipterids
Homopterids (Leafhoppers, Aphids, Cicadas)
Hymenoptera (Bees, Wasps, Ants)
Beetles
Odonata (Dragonflies, Damselflies)
Lepidoptera (Butterflies, Moths)

The last section on butterflies is disappointingly small, and doesn't have the larval stages, but hey, can't win 'em all. No moths, either, so I can't ID my caterpillars. But it is still a great start, and the photos are big and clear.

I am geeking out bigtime here. You'll have to excuse me.

Today I went on a little field trip with my Shi-Da class-as well as about 8 other classes and 5 teachers-to Yingge (鶯歌). It was a cool experience in a town famous for its ceramics, porcelain, and pottery industry. Our first stop was to the Yingge Ceramics Museum.

The Heavenly Official Conferring Fortune

Some more modern sculpture:

I love these two pieces, oh so much:

The Ceramics Studio:

My, er, creation...

And my wonderful lunch afterwards! Mmm, I will never get tired of beef noodle soup.

The Adventures of Pupation

Those of a more squeamish nature would be better off stopping.

Right.

Here.

---

I have a lovely progression of pupation currently going on with my three caterpillars. And, really, how often can you say that? It seems that the feeding frenzy that demolished my aunt's potted flowers was in preparation for their transition into these:

This one was still polishing off leaf after leaf after the other two had begun molding leaves around themselves, with the help of a little sticky silk. It's in transition now, and in fact you can still see the much-compressed eyespots still on its back--the part facing away from the camera.

This one was by far the most successful in making its leaf-cocoon. Therefore, I didn't see much of what happened to this guy until I saw all three had begun pupating, and decided to take them out to clean the jar and throw out the uneaten leaves.

This guy never ate at all, but began pupating right away. It's the darkest in color.

What's cool is that you can see the outlines of what will become each part of the newly formed moth-the angular top will be the head, proboscis, and legs, and the mold of where the wings will form, wrapped halfway around the body, is clear down to the venations. The right-most, segmented area is the thorax. It's the biggest part of the body because it stores a lot of blood and fluid that is then pumped into the wings to straighten them when the moth emerges. As well as, of course, storing all those important organs.

I can only assume these three are siblings from the same moth momma, so the progression also shows which caterpillar hatched first.

Childhood habits are not easily left behind

My new pet project:
When I awoke at the horrifyingly late hour of 11am today and limped woozily down for breakfast/brunch/lunch, my aunt informed me that she had found these large caterpillars in the rooftop garden that she keeps. I was fascinated and promised to go up and take a look, but while I was upstairs, she ended up bringing the two she'd found inside in a plastic egg carton case...haha. But what a delightful surprise! I told them what little I knew of the Sphingidae family, which these caterpillars belong to. And also how certain species are prone to parasitization by wasps, which lay their eggs in the caterpillar's body and essentially eat it from the inside out.

I'm not sure my aunt and cousins had really wanted to hear all of that. But in any case I've taken the larvae under my wing, and they are currently inhabiting a large plastic jar my aunt helped me set up, complete with air holes. I doubt any of my other aunts would have agreed to let me raise caterpillars, so I was extremely grateful for her help and enthusiasm.

We went upstairs, my aunt and I, to look for their host plants, two of which were completely stripped of leaves. We found a third caterpillar clutched to a fallen orchid, and it didn't look too happy. So it's also joined its brethren in the jar.

They are an impressive size, and I have been suddenly transported back to my childhood days of raising caterpillars by the dozens over the course of the summer, and the trial-and-error methods I went through to find out how to care for them. I really hope I can raise these guys to adulthood and see what they look like. While I cannot identify the caterpillars to species level, they have all the familiar characteristics of the Sphinx moths, and the adults are usually quite splendid.

They will definitely be accompanying me to the apartment I am moving into early July. All I need now is a reliable source of food. However, it seems that this host plant is popular, and a lot of the plants I saw out on the street were already stripped! I have never had to search for caterpillar food plants in a city before, where I may be chased by a building's owner for picking their plants. But my aunt assures me this particular plant is very common and more of a wildflower that sometimes gets planted outside buildings.

So, besides posting my adventures in the Isla Formosa, I'll also be recording the growth and progress of my newly acquired pets.

Do you want flies with that?

I'm currently sitting in a Starbucks across from the Taipei Railway Station, trying to make the most of the NT100 "WiFly" card I purchased to access the internet. Apparently it will only work for 24 hours?

I also got to experience what must annoy and frustrate many a foreigner trying to establish themselves as Chinese speakers. I asked for a roast chicken sandwich in Chinese, and then a Mocha Frappaccino, in English. As soon as I spoke in English, the cashier began replying to me in broken English, despite the fact that I continued speaking in Chinese afterwards.

And to have a person replying to you in a different language than you yourself are speaking to them elicits a strange feeling. Especially when the other person can barely speak that language, and you are trying to show you can understand their native language and don't need to struggle with a foreign tongue.

But then again, I've heard that many people here want the chance to speak more English, usually through language exchange. That's cool, but it's pretty hard to do when they lack the basics of grammar and just know vocabulary.

And my ears are horrible at deciphering even the slightest accents, anyway.